a scare with what ending?

A relative older lady got her blood screened as a routine thing they caught a whiff and like a hound looking for its prey kept looking with all tests and landed on a tiny little speck which was sitting and blinking with those innocent big eyes behind the body of the beautiful pancreas.... the poor little pancreas being labelled as the bomb.... 

Two days later it was time for my yearly check and lo behold not by my anxiety or my manifestation in black and white the reports came same as the relatives. Like a little mirror, my blood work mimicked a person's who I had the least respect for... so I have started the hunt... maybe if my little hunter boy and my soul searcher girl were there I would have found whatever it is sooner. 

My protectors aren't there and now I have got to look out for myself... 

Let's hope it's just a scare and a reminder that I better keep in shape all year round and not be a shape... 

Updates will follow. 

“I think perhaps I will always hold a candle for you – even until it burns my hand. And when the light has long since gone …. I will be there in the darkness holding what remains, quite simply because I cannot let go.”

― Ranata Suzuki

go get it

If you want your life to change. Go get it. 

You need to change it. 

Life doesn't change for you. 

You need to do what it takes. 

Not just start and leave it unfinished. 

You need to be consistent. Not just say yes, I have worked for one whole week at this and I can take one week off. Maybe not consciously. Maybe consciously you say oh I need to keep at it. But, your subconscious switches off. 

It doesn't work. 

Changing doesn't work that way. 

Consistency pays. 

You need to pick up. Whether you like it or not. 

You decided you wanted change. 

You decided the path. 

You have got to keep deciding to stay on the path. Every.single.day. 

It has to be a choice. It has to be a decision. 

If you want change as much as you think. You have got to keep going at it. And you have to make the change. 

Mindset needs to shift. 

Wish me luck and safe travels.